There's nothing to love about 'I Love You, Beth Cooper'
By: Sally Kline
Examiner Movie Critic
July 10, 2009
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| Paul Rust, left, and Hayden Panettiere star in "I Love You, Beth Cooper." (AP) |
It's an "edgy" summer comedy about the night two geeky graduating seniors have their last hurrah. It is characterized by gleeful underage substance abuse, outrageous physical damage and latent homosexuality.
But "I Love You, Beth Cooper" isn't "Superbad." It's just super bad.
Why the witty 2007 romp worked and this one does not is a mystery for the ages. Or, maybe, it's just that the actors in "Cooper" are unlikable and the characters they play are stupid; the direction is ham-fisted; and, the script isn't funny.
Originally, the distributor wasn't going to show today's farce to critics. That was a good first instinct. Because it's hard to imagine any adult -- much less any professional film deconstructor -- appreciating this series of cringe-worthy and sometimes even despicable gags. However, some kids may fall for the beyond-exaggerated stereotypes and pandering silliness, given the enduring appeal of its basic "revenge of the nerds" scenario.
The action is set in motion when Buffalo Glenn High School mega-dweeb Denis "The Penis" Cooverman (Paul Rust) gives a valedictory speech at graduation that calls out the whole class. He identifies in front of everyone the school bully, the resident anorexic, the snobby mean girl, and his best friend Rich Munsch (Jack T. Carpenter) as a closeted gay man. But the real kicker is Denis' own confession: He has been madly in love with blond cool chick Beth Cooper ("Heroes" star Hayden Panettiere) since the seventh grade -- even though they've never spoken.
Repercussions ensue throughout that evening as pals Denis and Rich try to have fun and emerge alive.
Beth and her crew -- including the predictably slutty, busty Teresa (Lauren Storm) -- are somewhat intrigued by the speech. But Beth's Army boyfriend Kevin (Shawn Roberts), his fascistic buddies, and others are not. Soon, main characters get hit by cars, covered in cow manure, pummeled by brutes, beguiled by strumpets, etc.
In a screenplay from Larry Doyle, based on his eponymous novel, and directed by veteran Chris Columbus ("Home Alone," two "Harry Potter" movies), little makes sense. A girl drives a truck into a house but doesn't get arrested. A straight 18-year-old boy is invited to shower with three naked girls but balks.
Forget logic, though. Parents must be warned that "I Love You, Beth Cooper" celebrates drinking with driving, violence and sexuality without consequences and really bad taste.
