Hillary Clinton never misses an opportunity to namedrop in her new book. Readers will be reminded that she was a cool candidate, the kind who joked around with Kate McKinnon on SNL, who went on tour with Beyoncé and Jay-Z, and who has her very own Hollywood stylist.
During the campaign, an oddly prescient Lena Dunham of HBO fame wondered if all the celebrity endorsement would end up "hurting her chances of winning." It certainly didn't help. On Election Day, an academy full of A-list celebrities couldn't outshine a blustering B-List blowhard. So, what's with all of Clinton's namedropping?
Perhaps it's because the 469-page memoir is more or less the drawn-out humble brag of a lonely political has-been.
Obviously, Clinton shout-outs are something of a currency. The comedian or popstar who gets a mention might be called on to do a fundraiser or pull a clip another time. But there's more than bargaining going on here. Clinton's obsession with clique comes as her popularity lags. Once the first woman to win the nomination of a major political party, she's now simultaneously an object of pity and the laughing stock of politics. While her new book tries to explain what happened, no one really accepts her laundry list of excuses for losing to a political rookie.
"The best thing she could do is disappear," a Clinton ally recently said, secretly summing up everything the Left has felt since November 9th. "She's doing harm to all of us because of her own selfishness. Honestly, I wish she'd just shut the fuck up and go away."
So, at the dining room table in the $1.16 million-dollar Chappaqua ranch house she bought to accommodate a White House staff that never arrived, Clinton started typing. She wrote about musicians John Legend, Lady Gaga, and Kelly Clarkson. She reminisced about author Margaret Atwood, funnyman Stephen Colbert, and tech-billionaire Tim Cook. Scanning the index of the book seems like reading a red carpet RSVP list.
Sure, they might've gone their separate ways since the election. Hollywood superstars seldom hang out with political burnouts who spend their time wandering around in the woods. The friendship was never really real. All they ever really had in common was a hatred for Trump and grand delusions about shattering glass ceilings.
But nobody had a fresher clique, not even Obama. And no one can mess with Clinton while she's reminiscing about all her long gone friends in that clique. So, she remembers, and she reminds the nation that she used to have really cool friends.
Philip Wegmann is a commentary writer for the Washington Examiner.