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Scott Ott's Examiner Scrappleface: Obama marks election anniversary with sabbatical

By: Scott Ott
Examiner Columnist
November 3, 2009

News fairly unbalanced. We report. You decipher.

President Obama marked the one-year anniversary of his election by announcing he would take a nine-month sabbatical "to rest and refresh after a grueling year of staggering accomplishment."

The former college professor said fulfilling his campaign promises has been "exhausting, but satisfying," and he needs time to regroup, retool and make plans for his remaining seven years.

"My historic election, followed by my landmark inauguration kicked off an unprecedented burst of accomplishment beyond the wildest dreams of our forefathers," said Obama. "In just 365 days, we've already talked about restoring U.S. moral leadership, we've advanced proposals to transform our economy from the dysfunctional free market model, we've given speeches about reducing our dependence on foreign oil and creating a burgeoning green economy, we've promoted dialogue aimed at bringing quality health care to 47 million uninsured Americans, and we've expressed our intention to end George Bush's futile war in Iraq, and to conquer al Qaeda in Afghanistan."

The president noted that "Rome wasn't built in a day, so if Caesar could see what I've already done, it would rock his world."

During his sabbatical, Obama said he plans to challenge himself intellectually by re-reading his previous memoirs and by writing a much-anticipated third autobiography.

"A president, like a college professor, has to keep his mind sharp," he said. "That's why I'm going to go back and study the works of one of the brightest minds of our generation. I know I still have much to learn from those pages."

Obama said he also plans to travel the world to learn more about the U.S. Constitution and capitalist economics, with planned stops in Europe, Africa, Venezuela, Cuba and several Arab kingdoms.

During the president's sabbatical, Vice President Biden will take over Obama's daunting schedule of daily news conferences, political fundraisers, television interviews, health care rallies, White House visits with important celebrities, and the other presidential duties as outlined in Article 2 of Constitution.

Examiner Columnist Scott Ott is editor in chief of ScrappleFace.com, the world's leading family-friendly news satire source.



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Reader Comments

All comments on this page are subject to our Terms of Use and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Examiner or its staff. Comment box is limited to 250 words.

JamesonLewis3rd

Nov 3, 2009

The excitement with which I anticipate BHO's next-in-a-series memoir is matched only by the fervor with which I am building a massive oaken bookshelf to house his extraordinary works.

 

Mike Konkel

Nov 3, 2009

I can hardly wait. This ought to read like something from communist russia. Obama is a fruit loop.

I hate calling names as that is so gay...but so is Obama

 

Retired CPO

Nov 3, 2009

It is so sad that a satirical author has to be careful lest his works be taken as journalism. Many times I have been taken aback by how close to reality Scott Ott's columns of satire are. This administration has dithered and dallied for ten months, to date, trying to avoid making an actual decision about the fate of our troops serving in the field. He still has not made that decision, but all of his research has brought him to the point that he is ready to alienate a large percentage of those with boots on the ground by injecting sexual activity and deviations into the mix. Mr. Obama is well served by the Constitution he so despises. It does not allow ex post facto law, and therefore he is safe from many of the crimes he could be prosecuted for. I only hope he sees the ghosts of patriots past during his sleep at night. They must be spinning in their graves by now.

 

Amanda

Nov 3, 2009

Satire is supposed to be funny. But Ott is not.

 

Jeff Stone

Nov 3, 2009

Anyone that can read: "During his sabbatical, Obama said he plans to challenge himself intellectually by re-reading his previous memoirs ...",
"A president, like a college professor, has to keep his mind sharp," he said. "That's why I'm going to go back and study the works of one of the brightest minds of our generation. I know I still have much to learn from those pages." and not guffaw, is to be pitied.

How sad to be you !

 

BFC Cpl Jack

Nov 4, 2009

I believe that the only patriot's ghost that bHo can see is that of Kunta Kinte

 

Freemon Sandlewould

Nov 7, 2009

Amanda thinx Scart eh not funnyz! Alertz da press!

Amanda has no sense of humor. That is what that proves!

 


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