Women’s sports are often ignored by American sports fans (because sexism, the Left would probably say, or because there generally isn’t the possibility of a brawl). Either that or they’re made interesting to men by adding tiny clothes into the mix.
But sometimes, it’s the women’s teams that are actually better – and therefore more patriotic for America – than the men’s teams.
Case in point: Soccer.
Americans were devastated Tuesday when the U.S. men's national soccer team lost to Belgium in a 2-1 match that that captivated as many as 20 million viewers on ESPN and possibly another 7 million or so on Univision - or roughly 8.5 percent of the American people.
The U.S. women’s national soccer team won’t get that many viewers, but they should. Because they’re actually good.
The men’s team has been around since 1885, but was officially founded in 1913. Since then, they have won exactly zero World Cups. In fact, the closest they’ve ever come to the cup was 3rd – in 1930, the first World Cup.
The women’s team, meanwhile, has only been around since the mid-1980s, but since then has won two World Cups, including the very first of its kind in 1991.
The men's soccer team is currently ranked 13th by the Fédération Internationale de Football Association. The highest they've ever been ranked is 4th, in 2006. The lowest they've ever been ranked is 36th in July 2012.
The women's team? They're currently number one. USA (ladies)! USA (ladies)! USA (ladies)!
And the lowest the women’s team has ever been in FIFA’s rankings is ... second.
The men’s team has also only made 10 appearances in the World Cup since 1930 ... meaning they didn’t qualify for half the men’s World Cups in history. And after 1950, the men’s team didn’t qualify for the World Cup again until 1990.
Meanwhile, the women’s team – as you can imagine – has appeared in all six women’s World Cups (meaning they’ve won a third of all women’s World Cups in history), and never finished lower than third.
That’s all well and good, you may be thinking, but there’s more to soccer than the World Cup (there’s not, at least to most Americans anyway, but whatever). Fine, let’s take a look at how the men and women stack up outside of the World Cup then.
Oh look, the men have won five Confederation of North, Central American and Caribbean Associations Football Gold Cups. Good for them!
Wait, no, sorry, the women have won six. Sorry, guys.
The women’s soccer team has also won four Olympic gold medals and a silver medal since women’s soccer became an Olympic sport in the 1996 games.
Meanwhile the men have won a silver and a bronze medal – back in the 1904 Olympic games.
So for all of you soccer fans (half of whom apparently work in the Washington Examiner office), you might want to put your patriotic self-worth behind the women’s soccer team – because they won’t let you down.