THE GIRL NEXT DOOR is Hollywood’s latest reprise of a time-honored theme, the teen movie. During the last 30 years, the industry has churned out one enterprise after another, producing standouts such as Risky Business, Dazed and Confused, Porky’s and Fast Times at Ridgemont High, to name just a few of my favorites. Director Luke Greenfield makes an admirable attempt to vault The Girl Next Door into the realm of these cult classics, and although he falls well short, his film provides enough hi-jinks, romance, and cleavage to be a box office favorite this spring.

Elisha Cuthbert plays Danielle, a porn star (stage name–“Athena”) who, for some unknown reason, has moved in next door to Westport High School’s student council president, Matthew Kidman (Emile Hirsch). Despite Matthew’s success in the world of student body politics, and his admission to Georgetown, he carries the heavy burden of virginity, which in the fantasy world of the teen movie is roughly equivalent to cancer. Fortunately for us, this cancer can be cured–and how.