Even Chris Cillizza beat him to the take. Creepy porn lawyer and accused woman-beater Michael Avenatti conceded in a public statement today that he will not run against Donald Trump for the presidency.
“I will continue to represent Stormy Daniels and others against Donald Trump and his cronies and will not rest until Trump is removed from office, and our republic and its values are restored,” wrote Avenatti. “I will also continue with my nearly twenty years of speaking truth to power and representing those who need an advocate against the powerful.”
Cue the world’s loudest laugh track.
Avenatti stands accused of beating up his girlfriend, faces a court order to pay a former colleague nearly $5 million, owes millions in unpaid taxes, and may be subject to a criminal probe after promulgating a baseless smear against Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh under risk of perjury. He was also recently evicted from his Newport Beach law offices for stiffing his landlord on rent.
Even for a regular Joe with a 9 to 5 desk job, let alone a political candidate, Avenatti’s life is a disaster. His 15 minutes have so far convinced most people that he is either a professional con artist or the world’s worst lawyer, depending on how much credence you grant his intelligence. His rhetoric about serving those “who need an advocate against the powerful” is laughable.
As Nate Silver correctly noted on Twitter following the announcement, Avenatti was polling at 1 percent in early Democratic primary polls, and he “doesn’t have Trump’s instincts and Democrats don’t have an appetite for a Trump-like candidate.”
Just as the charisma and appeal of Barack Obama cannot be replicated no matter how hard Beto O’Rourke and Spartacus try, Trump’s efficacy is unique to the Donald. Avenatti’s early combativeness wore thin fast, not just to the public but seemingly also to himself, as he grew more angry and desperate in the public eye.
