If you?re going to write a column called “Single in the City,” it helps to know something about the subject matter.

And I do. I?m 43, never been married because I?m not in the market for a future ex-Mrs. Collins. My female platonic friends (and they are legion) tell me I?m picky. For me, as the late Charlie Eckman used to say, it?s a very simple game. I want a woman who is intelligent without arrogance, funny without being (too) vulgar, compassionate without being maudlin and beautiful without the stain of vanity.