Runner survived ‘mental prison’ while in coma after accident

Brian Boyle told his story in a book called “Iron Heart: The True Story of How I Came Back From the Dead,” which was released Oct. 1. Here is part of his story in his own words on his blog, brianboyle.wordpress.com.

It was a little over a month and a half when I started to regain consciousness to the point that I knew what my surroundings were and I wasn’t hallucinating. But this was before I started talking.

Once they put me in a comatose state, the doctors didn’t know that when I woke up if I would be mentally okay; if I would be able to function; if I would be able to walk or sit up or even do anything without having to be helped. I was pretty much going to be a vegetable, and that’s what they were predicting.

I remember one day this doctor talking to my parents in my room about me having to go to a nursing home, because that’s where I was going to be spending the rest of my life, and I remember hearing that and being totally conscious of what he was saying; I didn’t like the sound of that and realized I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in a hospital bed in a nursing home. I’m mentally here, but nobody knows that because I can’t communicate. I’m paralyzed. I can’t move my fingers. I can’t blink. I can’t do anything but lie here and just suffer.

I was trapped. I was in a mental prison. I could not get out or tell anybody that I was okay. I was just hoping that they weren’t going to pull the plug on me because I didn’t know what the hell was going on. I couldn’t do anything. I screamed from the inside. I tried to do everything I could. I really tried hard, but it just wasn’t working.

Some days I would sleep. I would be in and out of consciousness. I was once awake for about a week; perhaps I don’t know if I were actually awake, but my eyes were open for the whole time, so I was sleeping while my eyes were open. It was horrible. Just horrible stuff. I was so weak that I couldn’t even close my eyelids. The nurses would have to put some kind of saline solution or Vaseline ointment on top of my eyelids.”

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