Department of Education Secretary Arne Duncan convened America’s first summit on bullying last week, and it’s about time. The goal was to bring together government agencies to both prevent and combat this growing problem. One in three students reports being bullied in middle or high school, and there are increased numbers of cyber bullying incidents. These are not rites of passage or normal adolescent behaviors, according to experts at the summit. They are learned patterns that can be changed.
My school’s bully was named Bradley. Everyone knew his pattern: He picked on students who were shy, overweight, or had a disability. We saw his actions in the schoolyard, yet we didn’t report him to teachers; we thought it was just the way it was. The message from the Department of Education, psychologists, and experts from the Department of Justice is that bullying has been protected for too long; it’s time to educate parents, teachers, and students to recognize when a child is being bullied and stop it before it’s too late.
It was too late for Phoebe Prince of Massachusetts, who at the age of 15 took her own life this year after months of relentless bullying. One of the difficulties in tackling this problem is that victims are so ashamed of being the target that they join with others in protecting the identity of the bully. Psychologists advise parents to listen closely to their teens who dread going to school; that’s one signal to watch for. Others include unexplained bruises or torn clothing, a drop in grades, or fear of riding the school bus.
But the school climate is not going to change without efforts from the community, the school administration, and teachers. It’s going to take more than a mention at back-to-school night to effect permanent change. Sexual harassment in the workplace is much less common now than it was a decade or two ago, and that’s the result of seminars, workshops and meetings devoted to educating personnel. A similar effort will need to take place in all our schools if we are going to stop bullying.
One approach is Challenge Day, a one-day program for middle and high school students that encourages participants to practice acceptance and empathy. It is interactive, and begins with games requiring teamwork. The activities build during the day to a point where every one of the 100 participants feels a connection with others in the room. Other organizations sponsor similar activities for schools, but all are costly in both time and money. These initiatives would need the community’s support, and would need to reach all students, in order to truly put the problem of bullying to rest.
It is too late to save Phoebe Prince, and it’s too late for me to stand up to Bradley and defend the girls he picked on in the schoolyard. But it’s not too late to become more aware of the problem and its devastating effects on our children. It seems that most education “summits” go nowhere. Let’s not allow that to happen with this one.
Erica Jacobs, whose column appears Wednesday, teaches at George Mason University. E-mail her at [email protected]
