Q: When I was on a plane recently, the woman sitting next to me fell asleep. I needed to get past her to use the restroom, but she was out cold. I tried saying, “Excuse me, ma’am, could I get by” a few times, but she just wouldn’t wake up. I actually checked that she was still breathing! Simply stepping over her was not possible because she had her tray table down with a laptop on it. I tried tapping her arm, but that didn’t work right away — I had to do it multiple times. Finally she woke up, but she gave me a horrified look and said, “What are you trying to do?” I explained that I had asked her several times to let me by, but she didn’t wake up. She said, “Next time just speak louder! You don’t need to touch me!” I was really embarrassed. Did I do something wrong by tapping her arm? Honestly, if I had raised my voice any more, I would have been yelling. A: In general, one shouldn’t go around touching sleeping strangers. But in this situation, tapping your seatmate on the arm is much better than yelling, because yelling on a plane has the potential to freak lots of people out. Even if you just yell, “Excuse me!” all of a sudden, loud noise would still startle people. So, no, I don’t think you did anything wrong, as long as you were tapping her arm gently.
Q: Is it really true that I can’t go into a bathhouse in Japan because I have a tattoo of a peace sign on my wrist?
A: In Japan, tattoos are often associated with organized crime, and some bathhouses do not admit customers with tattoos of any sort. Not all of them have a no-tattoo policy, and not all of the ones that do enforce it (especially with tourists), but you’ll find certain places are very strict. I’d say it’s worth a shot … just understand that you might be turned away.
Q: What do you think of people in bulkhead seats putting their feet — sometimes their bare feet — on the wall? I think it’s rude. But my friend says the wall is carpeted, so she doesn’t think it needs to be treated any differently than the floor.
A: I don’t like feet on the bulkhead. I take your friend’s point, but I still don’t think it’s polite to put your feet up like that in a public place. It looks sloppy and careless — kind of the postural equivalent of chewing with your mouth open. And I’m not a fan of bare feet on planes, either. There’s too much potential for foul odors.
