Some players have a posse — Gilbert Arena has a sidekick. Agent Zero, meet Agent Zip.
The Wizards guard spent the offseason combining two cartoon icons to create his own coming animated show — Gazo the Pranksta. Think of it as a Fat Albert and the Gang knockoff plus a Stitch-like character named Agent Zip that helps the youngsters through everyday life. That is, when they’re not playing the new EA Sports video game, NBA Live 2008, with Arenas’ mug on the cover that debuts today. Arenas played it 24 hours straight over the weekend himself.
Yes, life is good for the three-time All-Star as the Wizards open training camp today. Who needs teammates when you can have your own starting five shown on gazothepranksta.com. It’s Arenas as a teenager with his friends and a animal that looks like a failed science experiment involving a deer, bat and squirrel.
The little fellow even came with its own press release tucked inside:
“Hypocrities, fools and oversensitive beware.
Embrace your differences. Who said life was fair?
Conforming from the inside. What are you doing?
Watching from the outside. Creativity brewing.
Don’t take yourself so seriously.
Things aren’t always as they appear.
It’s cool to be different. Especially here.
We’re Generation Zero.”
Well, at least we know Arenas won’t be leaving for Maya Angelo’s job.
“It’s about high school kids like me,” Arenas said. “[The other characters are] my friends. It’s about what happens in high school. You guys have seen ‘Super Bad.’ It’s an adult–type cartoon — South Park, Family Guy.”
Arenas is having fun whenever possible. Blowing out his knee late last season meant an offseason of running with a parachute, climbing bleachers and racing down a flat track. Playing video games and creating new projects were his summertime pleasures.
“I still play 12 hours of basketball,” he said. “When you get hurt you think of new things. That’s what summer projects are for.”
Arenas even toyed with buying the Barry Bonds’ No. 756 baseball from the maniac who’s donating it to the National Baseball Hall of Fame with a big asterisk.
“The odds of him selling it, I don’t know,” Arenas said. “I watched his interview online and he says he doesn’t want the ball. If you don’t want it I’ll take it from you. I thought it was bad. Baseball is the fans’ sport. Now you’re taking this ball and marking it and you’re basically telling fans ‘Screw history.’ That’s the only thing I have a problem with.”
So there is a serious side to Agent Zero after all. Arenas even predicted the Wizards should reach the Eastern Conference finals this season now that the roster is healthy once more. Anything else is a failure.
“We know we’re a dangerous team,” he said.
Just ask Agent Zip.
Rick Snider has covered local sports since 1978. Contact him at [email protected].
