An illegal immigrant just crossed the border and immediately had a baby. Congratulations to the taxpayers!

United States Customs and Border Protection on Monday sent out an announcement: The taxpayers just became the proud parent of a beautiful new baby! Custody will be shared with the Honduran woman who crossed into the country illegally and immediately went into labor.

Congratulations to us all.

The woman did what so many migrants do, thanks to the gaping hole in our border at the most southern tip of Texas, where the Rio Grande prohibits any meaningful barrier to stop the unlimited flow of people from Central America.

She crossed the short distance of the river between Mexico and the U.S. and, once she hit land, she wandered about until Border Patrol happened to find her on Sunday.

“Upon arrival to the subject’s location, [agents] discovered a distressed female, later identified as an adult Honduran citizen, experiencing labor pains,” the CBP release said. “Agents immediately requested EMS and advised the Brownsville Border Patrol Station of the situation. While awaiting the arrival of EMS, the woman went into labor requiring the agents and officers to deliver the baby.”

That baby is, of course, entitled to full U.S. citizenship and all of the bells and whistles that come with it, which includes food and housing, all courtesy of you, the taxpayer.

It’s not like we’re struggling with any of our own problems here or anything. True, there’s a raging pandemic, the bitter aftermath of an election from hell, and the continued race riots occurring in our biggest cities but hey, have a heart.

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