Monica Lewinsky said she would apologize directly to Hillary Clinton for the affair she had with former President Bill Clinton if the two women met.
“If I were to see Hillary Clinton in person today, I know that I would summon up whatever force I needed to again acknowledge to her — sincerely — how very sorry I am,” Lewinsky wrote for Vanity Fair on Tuesday.
“I know I would do this, because I have done it in other difficult situations related to 1998. I have also written letters apologizing to others — including some who also wronged me gravely. I believe that when we are trapped by our inability to evolve, by our inability to empathize humbly and painfully with others, then we remain victims ourselves,” Lewinsky added.
[Also read: Hillary Clinton: Bill Clinton’s extramarital affair with Monica Lewinsky wasn’t an abuse of power]
Lewinsky first apologized to the former first lady and the Clintons’ daughter, Chelsea, in a 1999 interview with Barbara Walters.
“I recognize the pain and the suffering they’ve gone through because of this. I wouldn’t dream of asking Chelsea and Mrs. Clinton to forgive me, but I would ask them to know that I am very sorry for what happened, for what they’ve been through,” she said then.
Lewinsky explained in her Vanity Fair essay why she decided to participate in an upcoming docuseries “The Clinton Affair” for A&E. She quoted the former president as part of her reasoning: “Because I could.”
Clinton was asked in 2004 by Dan Rather why he had an inappropriate relationship with a White House intern. “Because I could,” he responded.
“Filming the documentary forced me to acknowledge to myself past behavior that I still regret and feel ashamed of. There were many, many moments when I questioned not just the decision to participate, but my sanity itself,” she wrote.
“Yes, the process of filming has been exceedingly painful. But I hope that by participating, by telling the truth about a time in my life — a time in our history — I can help ensure that what happened to me never happens to another young person in our country again,” she added.
She said telling the story in her own way lets her control it.
“[Director Blair Foster] pointed out to me during one of the tapings that almost all the books written about the Clinton impeachment were written by men. History literally being written by men. In contrast, the docuseries not only includes more women’s voices, but embodies a woman’s gaze: two of the three main editors and four of the five executive producers are women,” she said.
