President Pelosi?

Democrats spent two humiliatingly long years immolating themselves in the attempt to thwart President Trump. Yet, the only one to finally do it was a nearly 80-year-old woman who barely had the favor of her own party just months ago.

Nancy Pelosi doesn’t really tweet. She doesn’t stream Instagram live videos. Her version of the prime-time talk show circuit is Chris Cuomo, not Stephen Colbert. She’s a multimillionaire limousine liberal from San Francisco, and she might just be the Democratic Party’s best bet to become president of the United States.

Democrats still have no clear front-runner for president in what is likely to be a field of two dozen reasonably serious candidates or more.

The obvious leader in the polls is former Vice President Joe Biden, who has remained largely popular not just from his base but within the Rust Belt. He has a very real shot at unseating Trump, but that requires him to prove that intersectionality and ideological extremism don’t dominate Democratic politics.

Sen. Bernie Sanders, I-Vt., seems to have the same problem, with the left-wing base already ready for Old Major to exit the arena and be replaced by a shinier, newer, browner, and more female socialist superstar. No matter that Sanders almost singlehandedly mainstreamed socialism in the modern Democratic Party — he’s old and white and past his prime.

The remaining presumptive candidates have made fools of themselves as the primary season has begun in full. Beto O’Rourke blogs like a bad Jack Kerouac wannabe. Sen. Kamala Harris drops mediocre mixtapes in extremely cringeworthy fashion. Sen. Elizabeth Warren looks lonely drinking a beer in her own home as she tries to kick it with the kids.

And of course, they all continue to step on rakes in the name of the #Resistance.

The Democratic primary is destined to become a war of who can own Trump the hardest. But the thing about a shameless president is that you can’t dunk on him with words and performances. Any insult you lob at him will just come off as a desperate, weaker version of something he already tweeted at Jim Acosta a week ago.

People like Trump because he doesn’t fight on the chessboard. Instead, he flips it over in a rage and punches his opponents in the face. Democrats have tried to fight back his way, but he’s a master at this.

Pelosi is different. This is the woman, who through hell and high water, rammed Obamacare through Congress and down the throats of an American people who didn’t want it. She’s an expert whip who just brought Trump to his knees in one of the biggest losses of his presidency and didn’t even break a sweat while doing it.

It brings me physical pain and visceral self-loathing to admit it. But Nancy Pelosi, with her immaculate injectables and that red coat, is cool without even trying, in the most unforced way possible. She leans into the uptight grandma persona instead of rejecting it. Unlike Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-N.Y., or Sen. Cory Booker, D-N.J., Republicans don’t hate Pelosi because she’s hilariously inept and idiotic. They hate her because she’s frighteningly good at her job.

Most importantly, Pelosi wouldn’t have to tweet angrily or post emphatic Periscopes to prove she hates Trump. Her short tenure as House Speaker this year could comprise her entire campaign: “She beat Trump.”

And going forward, every vote she whips and every press conference she holds would be resistance enough.

For what it’s worth, there’s been zero buzz around a Pelosi presidency. Republicans can breathe a sigh of relief, for now. But if she ran? Well, I’d give her better odds than almost anyone.

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