Saturday Night Live brings on star studded cast to re-create Dem. debate

This week’s Cold Open for Saturday Night Live re-created Tuesday’s Democrat debate. All the candidates were represented, and some by noteworthy actors.

In his introduction, Gov. Martin O’Malley mentioned that “when I was mayor of Baltimore, I did such a good job, they made two TV shows about my city, Homocide and The Wire.

A rather goofy Gov. Lincoln Chafee gushed “I used to be Senator, and that was fun. And now I’m here and this is fun too!”

Next up was Jim Webb, played by Alec Baldwin. He wanted everyone to know:

Hello, I’m Jim Webb and it’s about damn time I get to talk! What has it been, a thousand years? Here’s the deal. I fought in Vietnam and I don’t want to brag about how much ass I kicked, but let’s just say, I kicked every single ass.

After hearing from the three, an Anderson Cooper segued with “now that we’ve met those people, let’s meet the real candidates.”

Hillary came out and promised that “you’re really going to like the Hillary Clinton my team and I created for this debate…”

Bernie Sanders, played by Larry David, then came out saying “I’m hungry but I’m good” and that “I’m going to dial it up to a 10.” After screaming about “we need a revolution,” Cooper reminded him to “pace yourself.”

During questions, Sanders talked about banks, and how they “chain pens to their desk,” and suggested that we make banks pay for college for everyone.”

Hillary couldn’t believe hat the crowd was loving Sanders so much, as she believed that “this year I thought I got to be the cool black guy.”

Webb periodically asked “where’s my time,” but then passed on questions such as his A rating from the NRA and statements made about affirmative action. He did constantly refer to himself as “President Webb,” though.

The e-mail server did come up, with Sanders also wanting to know “what’s the deal with e-mail anyways,” if you lose your password.

Reference was made to Hillary trying to appeal to the younger generations so obviously, but the best statements made were about Sanders being an outsider:

I don’t have a Super PAC, I don’t even have a backpack! I carry my stuff around loose in my arms, like a professor, you know, between classes. I own one pair of underwear, that’s it! Some of these billionaires, they’ve got three, four pairs! And I don’t have a dryer. I have to put my clothes on the radiator. So who do you want as president, one of these Washington insiders? Or a guy who has one pair of clean underwear that he dries on the radiator?

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