Popular, but bad for your health. That’s how the media is describing platform sandals, simultaneously “the shoe of the summer,” per Vogue, and a fashion choice to “definitely stay away from,” per doctors.
But despite warnings from the medical field, the resurgent trend is too full of nostalgia to keep eager millennials away.
So they’re basically the Bernie Sanders of footwear.
Like Sanders, platform sandals have been around for approximately thousands of years. Greek actors in 220 B.C. first wore the shoes to elevate themselves onstage, and Sanders entered electoral politics around the same time. He’s served in Congress for almost 30 years, this coming after his stint in local Vermont politics.
The independent from Vermont is once again campaigning for president. This time around he’s the same cranky politician, just a little older. But age isn’t the only thing that unites Sanders and the ubiquitous platform shoe.
Platform sandals may be having a moment, but they weren’t cool in the ’90s, and they’re not cool now. These hideous shoes are needlessly uncomfortable, and they might even strain your back and increase your medical bills. If Sanders got elected president, “college for all” and “Medicare for all” would empty American wallets in a way that might make you wish a sprained ankle was the worst of your troubles.
Among millennials, socialism is trendy, like dating apps and Netflix and the “only ’90s kids will remember” meme. But that doesn’t mean it’s good for them, and it may signal the death of some of the conveniences they love.
From health insurers to doctors, members of the healthcare industry know that universal healthcare will not be the socialist paradise it’s billed as. Instead, it would balloon government spending and increase wait times.
Nevertheless, Sanders continues to poll among the top Democratic candidates for the 2020 presidential election. “Bernie bros” should just keep in mind that if they sprain their ankle wearing a platform shoe, they’d better hope the healthcare industry hasn’t been stymied by Sanders’ “Medicare for all.”
