STUPID CRIMES

Published February 16, 2012 5:00am ET



Fun loving

An Oregon couple involved in a Valentine’s Day role playing was arrested after Portland police responded to reports of a woman naked and bound in a man’s car.

A witness called police to say that a vehicle was seen leaving the parking lot with a naked female tied up in the back with duct tape over her mouth. The caller said that the male subject said they “were just having some fun.”

Nine police cars converged on the lovebirds. The embarrassed couple, Nikolas Harbar, 31, and Stephanie Pelzner, 26, were booked into the county jail and pleaded to disorderly conduct charges.

Arrest jacket

A robber of a pharmacy in Norwich, Conn., left behind a key piece of evidence.

Police said Joseph Michaud donned a mask when he entered the Walgreens. He indicated that he had a gun in his right pocket and demanded that money from the register.

Police who were investigating the robbery found a jacket near the crime scene. In one of the pockets was a letter addressed to Michaud. Officers went to his house, but he was not home.

Michaud turned himself in the next morning, saying he had spent the $240 from the robbery on crack cocaine and slept in the woods, police said.

A six-finger discount

Police in Georgia seized 78 pairs of counterfeit Nike sneakers after they noticed the logo on the Air Jordans had too many fingers.

Police said the iconic logo of Michael Jordan had six fingers on his none-dunking hand. The serial numbers on the shoes’ tongue did not match the numbers on the box.

And officers said they could peel the Nike logos right off.

Hickeys lead to teacher’s arrest

A 20-year-old elementary teacher’s aide was arrested for allegedly having sex with a student after a school employee noticed hickeys on the boy’s neck.

A co-worker reported her concerns to authorities in San Miguel, Calif., after seeing Sarah Drown walking with an eighth-grader and seeing hickeys on the boy’s neck soon afterward. Drown admitted that she was feeling very depressed when she received a call from the teen. They took a walk, talked and returned to her home to watch a movie, police said.

When the detective confronted the 14-year-old, he replied: “The heart wants what the heart wants.”

— Scott McCabe