Conservatives like to tout the benefits of federalism, and there are many. However, if states are the “laboratories of democracy,” there will always be a few mad scientists to contend with. One of the dumber things you’ll experience in driving across the country is that in Oregon you’re not allowed to pump your own gas. As of January 1, that’s changing somewhat. Thanks to a bill passed by the legislature last year, you can now pump your own gas in about half the state’s counties—the rural counties that have fewer than 40,000 residents.
Beyond being a weak attempt at a jobs program for low-income residents, there’s never been any reasonable rationale for not allowing self-service in Oregon. Nonetheless, many of the state’s residents are unfamiliar with pumping their own gas. When KTVL, a Medford, Oregon, TV station, announced the change in rules on its Facebook page—well, it turns out that nanny states create a bunch of whiny babies.
The station was deluged with panicked comments: “I don’t even know HOW to pump gas and I am 62, native Oregonian. . . . I say NO THANKS! I don’t want to smell like gasoline!” and “I will not feel safe pumping my own gas. . . . Not to mention it’s freezing and rainy. So thank you to all who voted to change it. You have now taken away a nice luxury that most of us enjoyed.” Other comments ranged from concerns about getting cancer to being attacked by transients while you’re forced to leave the safety of your automobile.
This being the Internet, people from around the country have naturally taken it upon themselves to go to KTVL’s Facebook page and roundly mock Oregonians for their silly fears: “Is this how the fires in California started? Was it caused by someone from Oregon trying to travel and pump their own gas?” Only at NJ.com, one of the biggest news providers in New Jersey, which is the only other state daft enough not to let citizens pump their own gas, was there a show of solidarity: “Oregon descends into madness, forces citizens to pump their own gas.”
Still, in a progressive state that prides itself on being the first to legalize assisted suicide and allowing teenagers 15 or older to get Medicaid to pay for their sex change without parental permission, you’d think citizens would be more open to such modest new freedoms. Oregon’s state motto is “She flies with her own wings,” but they really should consider that sometimes there’s a reason every other state has a different flight plan.
