Once upon a time the world was run by preppy Wasp men and well-tended sylph-like women. The rules were clear: casual was OK for men so long as they had a crocodile sewn over their hearts, and desert was OK for women, some known as “social X-rays” — once a month, if that. Lisa Birnbach, co-author of The Official Preppy Handbook (1989) tells the Wall Street Journal, “Once upon a time the Lacoste shirt was really the only sporty shirt that you would wear,” the “you” not intended to include me and most of my friends but better-muscled chaps known as “Chip,Trip, or Kip” — names selected by the Journal, not yours truly. Times surely have changed. For one thing, sporty shirts are no longer worn only for a round of tennis or golf with country-club buddies after a hard morning at father’s investment bank. For another, what the Journal calls “the shirt that started it all,” now has competitors that dare to innovate with such features as four- rather than two-button plackets.
Meanwhile, wraith is out, and even illegal for French, Spanish, and Israeli models. As a glance at the stars in any sitcom shows, rotund is in for women. Which is bad news for Spanx the company, no financial lightweight with its $400 million in annual sales of what the New York Times calls “body-sculpting bras and bodysuits.” The company is “gasping” to remain relevant in the age of shifting “body ideals”, yoga pants, once more under- than over-garment, and “athleisure” apparel, which I think but am not certain includes something called “jogger pants”, which Google’s analysis of six billion data points shows to be “trending”. And which data analyzed by the Wall Street Journal suggest are worn more for “leisure” than for “ath.” Fat-shaming, compression and squeezing are out, comfort for “real bodies” is in, which explains. Thin is out, “diversity” in body shapes is in. And sex is out: troubled retailer Abercrombie & Fitch has announced that it is abandoning sexy ads and the hiring of models based on “body type or physical attractiveness,” and is re-labelling its sales staff “Brand Representatives” rather than “Models.”
Now, men in loose-fitting, Hawaiian-flowered, untucked, belly-covering shirts are free to take their non-Spanxed wives and dates for a drink at some of the more modern, democratic eateries and clubs. O tempora! O mores!
