FIRST SEX: Late yesterday afternoon, George Gedda of the Associated Press filed an interesting wire about the anthrax risk currently confronting employees at the State Department’s headquarters building in Washington. On Monday, department spokesman Richard Boucher had announced that, save for two mailrooms, the complex appeared entirely clear of anthrax spores. Gedda reported that yesterday, however, at an agency-wide assembly led by Colin Powell, a certain Dr. Cedric Dumont, head of the State Department’s medical unit, revised Boucher’s analysis just a bit. “[Anthrax spores] are probably all over the place,” Dumont blandly observed. And “your office areas probably have some contamination”–though not enough to pose a serious threat. The bad news is that foreign service officers in attendance, according to Gedda, showed a “strong undercurrent of skepticism” about such official reassurances. The good news, though, is that State Department employees continue to trust the news media implicitly and absolutely. For instance: During the Q&A that followed Dr. Dumont’s briefing, State Department driver Linda Thompson, now on antibiotics because she has handled agency mail, felt free to ask the most intensely personal question imaginable, fully confident that none of the journalists present would even think of writing it down and embarrassing her. We know this because George Gedda wrote down her worry that Cipro was “going to affect me sexually.” Relax, Ms. Thompson. Your question is currently circulating among hundreds of millions of people worldwide who read publications carrying the AP wire. One of them is certain to have a knowledgeable opinion about your orgasms. So much for sex. Now on to drugs. “Have you ever wondered how polling firms can release national polling data on a daily basis, yet you have never been called once for your opinion?” This was the interesting question posed three weeks ago by Rob Kampia, executive director of the Marijuana Policy Project, to the 12,000 people on his organization’s e-mail list. Some number of whom, after a good night’s sleep, a breakfast of breath mints, and a generous application of Visine, have no doubt since managed actually to read Kampia’s message. Anyhow. It seems the Marijuana Policy Project has embarked on a “groundbreaking” effort to empower America’s previously unpolled pot-smokers. And it seems MPP is being supported in this effort by Zogby International, which is “one of the nation’s most accurate and prestigious polling organizations.” Or at least it was until recently. Zogby, Kampia reports, “is developing an on-line population of civic-minded individuals who can assist in producing the most reliable, accurate, and scientific on-line polling available.” And for every 500 civic-minded dopers MPP supplies as respondents for its polls, Zogby has agreed to “place a marijuana polling question” on one of its nationwide surveys. “Registering for participation in Zogby on-line polls,” Kampia points out, “gives you an opportunity to have your opinions counted.” And “it will benefit MPP in a big way.” Kampia’s bulletin does not reveal when exactly these new, cannabis-enhanced Zogby polls will debut. And since the terms of his agreement with Zogby include “complete confidentiality” for Marijuana Policy Project members, we’ll probably never know for sure. But what fun it will be to guess! On October 24, Zogby released the results of a just-concluded three-day tracking poll involving 1,000 likely voters nationwide. One question asked these respondents what they would do if they “worked in a business you assumed would be a target for terrorist anthrax contaminations?” Three percent said they would leave or quit permanently. And another 15 percent said they would leave or quit until the threat had passed. But 76 percent said they’d stay at work as if nothing unusual was happening at all. My bet? People in that last category were definitely stoned. David Tell is opinion editor at The Weekly Standard.
