News fairly unbalanced. We report. You decipher
A day after the heads of the 20 leading industrialized nations agreed to pump $1 trillion into the International Monetary Fund (IMF) to stimulate worldwide recovery, the White House revealed that President Barack Obama consented to the G-20 stimulus deal on the condition that the IMF be sold to Fiat, the Italian automaker, by the end of the month.
Just last week, the administration ordered Fiat to buy Chrysler, making the IMF the second failed enterprise this year to be gobbled up by the maker of the economical 3-door Grande Punto.
“The IMF is essentially an aggregation of a failed brands,” said White House press secretary Robert Gibbs. “It loans money to a raft of toxic nations…or rather, legacy nations. The president believes that if Fiat can turn around Chrysler, we may have some hope for the IMF.”
The president, who this week forced General Motors CEO Rick Wagoner to step down, has reportedly also considered terminating “whoever loused up Great Britain’s economy.”
Considering President Obama recently gave Prime Minister Gordon Brown a DVD set, and gave Queen Elizabeth II an iPod, it’s anyone’s guess which one he’ll fire first.
“Based on his generous gifts, one can see that the president has deep affection for both the Queen and the Prime Minister,” said Mr. Gibbs. “But President Obama has been elected to save the world, so Britons will just have to hope that God saves the Queen.”
Examiner columnist Scott Ott is editor-in-chief of ScrappleFace.com, the family-friendly news satire site, and anchor of ScrappleFace Network News (SNN), seen on YouTube.
