Why they still pine for Christie By Noemie Emery
Jonah Goldberg dreams Reince Priebus strides on to the platform, orders the stand-ins — Newt, Romney, Rick, and Paul — back to their dressing-rooms, and summons the “real actors” — Bobby Jindal, Chris Christie, Mitch Daniels, etc. — to get back on the stage.
When surrogates out-perform the people they’re backing you know things aren’t happy.
This latest Newt boom in South Carolina — preceded as it is by booms for Rick Perry, Herman Cain, Rick Santorum, the first boom for Newt, and even Mitt Romney, who only a week ago could win 50 states — will likely deflate as surely as those did, reflecting the profound irritation with all of the candidates.
Dan Balz of the Washington Post sees a “mismatch” between the Republican party and all of those running, who lack something they don’t even realize is missing.
Goldberg is right, there is a Christie-shaped hole in the Republican Party, which each candidate touches on ever so slightly, but which none really can fill.
This Christie-shaped hole would fit someone who a) has won and run in a swing or blue state; b) appeals to the conservative GOP base and to independents; c) can explain conservative principles to a general audience; d) who can think on his feet in debates and in forums; e) who can attack Obama without alienating people who voted for him in 2008 and now wish they hadn’t and; f), whose experience is current, or at any rate, recent, who understands and better still, comes from the war against entitlements and expansion of government that broke out in 2009-2010.
This fits many in the state houses and Congress, but none in the current field of contention, which accounts for the flailings and constant depression: If people want a non-Romney, they don’t like the available alternatives, either, or else they don’t like them for long.
“Blasts from the past” describes all these contenders, who long ago passed their sell-by dates, which applies more to ideas than to actuarial age. Newt’s great achievement is 18-years-old (and could vote, if it wanted), which was the year that Santorum entered the Senate, and in which Romney lost his first race.
As a result, they keep on re-fighting old battles and heresies, which are hardly germane to our current dilemmas, and about which anxious voters could hardly care less.
All left office years ago, and all left as losers: Gingrich was tossed out in 1999 in a coup by his caucus; Romney stepped down in 2006 to avoid being defeated for re-election, and Santorum lost in the same year by an 18 point spread.
Why they all lost becomes evident each time one of them speaks. Santorum goes on about gays and abortion in the tones of a zealot, Romney inherited the family gene for the suicide sound bite, and Gingrich makes sensible ideas such as teaching children from welfare backgrounds the value of work sound like a nightmare from “Oliver Twist.”
After his win in South Carolina, Gingrich gave a speech that would kill him among a general audience, ignoring the economy, stupid, and ranting on about Saul Alinsky and Newt’s terrible treatment by journalists. Most voters never heard of Alinsky.
“You have to get people who voted for Obama,” says Ann Coulter, wisely, “and having a candidate who …. calls Obama a ‘Kenyan socialist’ is not what you need.”
Each looks like a fool when he claims to be an outsider, being too rich, and/or too close to the culture of K Street. Give us a break.
Or better still, give us Chris Christie, or any of the other ‘real actors’ whom Goldberg is seeking. Or this show may be closed down on the road.
Examiner Columnist Noemie Emery is contributing editor to TheWeekly Standard and author of “Great Expectations: The Troubled Lives of Political Families.”
