Guilty pleasure or just guilty? No doubt about it, “The Losers” is a mindless, preposterous pseudomilitary action picture, as adapted from the Vertigo comic book. On a scale of 1 to 10, it barely ranks a 2 for story logic and originality, character development and wit.
Still, the weirdly happy warriors — a rogue special-forces squad on one side, a corrupt CIA honcho on the other — have a certain dense charm. And the filmmakers “blow up stuff good — real good,” to paraphrase John Candy’s redneck pop culture maven from the genius “SCTV.” (Come to think of it, unless you’re an action junkie, you’d be better off digging up episodes of that ancient Canadian skit show than heading to “Losers” this weekend.)
Infamous uberproducer Joel Silver has been blowing up stuff — good and bad — for huge profits since the 1980s. Here, he enlists lesser director Sylvain White (“Stomp the Yard,” “I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer”) and screenwriters Peter Berg and James Vanderbilt to make boom-boom (and money) out of Andy Diggle’s graphic novel characters.
‘The Losers’
2 out of 5 Stars
Stars: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Zoe Saldana, Chris Evans, Jason Patric
Director: Sylvain White
Rated PG-13 for sequences of intense action and violence, a scene of sensuality and language
Running Time: 98 minutes
When a mission in Bolivia to neutralize an international criminal goes horribly wrong, an elite team of macho American enforcers is framed by the megalomaniacal intelligence officer Max (Jason Patric) who is really responsible.
Former Col. Franklin Clay (“Grey’s Anatomy’s” Jeffrey Dean Morgan) and his men fake their deaths then hook up with a sexy mystery woman who also has motive to get revenge on Max. For reasons not explained — except that the movie is idiotic — this Aisha (“Avatar’s” Zoe Saldana) has hand-to-hand combat skills and weapons expertise equal to the professional soldiers. She joins them to prevent Max from acquiring next-generation weapons of mass destruction and intentionally starting World War III.
Yes, that’s the modest premise here: The fine actor, who made classy movies in the 1990s, Patric smirks in his seersucker suit as a villain in the mold of a Goldfinger. Patric lacks that flourish, but he’s obviously enjoying himself. Same goes for the guys who join Clay to stop him, including goofy computer specialist Jensen (“Fantastic Four’s” Chris Evans), ornery knife fighter Roque (Idris Elba), lovable transportation expert Pooch (Columbus Short), and smoldering hot sharpshooter Cougar (Oscar Jaenada).
Nobody does any real acting; almost everybody has appeal. Many “Losers” will love them and the succession of fireballs that explode around them.
