Maryland Gov. Larry Hogan on March 23 declared that all nonessential businesses in the state must close. No more dog groomers. No more shoe stores. No more craft stores.
But the liquor stores? Of course they’re still open.
In the Free State, at least, your Grey Goose is officially a necessity.
Maybe Hogan learned a lesson from Denver. Mayor Michael Hancock announced earlier that same day that, unlike grocery stores, pharmacies, and gas stations, liquor stores in Denver would have to close down by 5 p.m. that Tuesday. “We do not have them listed as essential,” Hancock said. “As much as I might think it’s essential for me, it’s not essential for everyone.”
You can guess how the people of Denver reacted. Within 15 minutes of the announcement, according to the Denver Post, lines were forming outside of the liquor stores, in which customers were now packed cheek-to-potentially-viral-cheek.
On Colfax Avenue downtown, the venerable Argonaut Wine & Liquor, Denver’s largest liquor store, soon was functioning like a hot night club: Bouncers were allowing in one customer for each customer who exited.
In many states, the booze shops now operate like an old-school hardware store. There’s no more browsing the whiskey aisle or the vermouth shelf. Instead, the clerk greets you at the front door, while tables and other partitions form a 6-foot buffer between clerk and client, and then another staffer fetches your order.
Some distilleries are adding to their offerings amid the virus. Hendricks Family Distillery in Omro, Wisconsin, is one of many that have started selling hand sanitizer, which is, after all, at least 120 proof (any less than 60% alcohol, and it won’t kill germs). Hendricks Vodka is fermented from potatoes, as opposed to grain-neutral spirits. That makes it easier to shift to hand sanitizer, which Hendricks is giving away.
Vodka maker Tito’s also waded into the sanitizer business after the company found it necessary to tell people that no, pouring its vodka on your hands won’t keep you safe from the coronavirus.
There’s also a danger, of course, in using too much vodka to cure your social-distancing blues.
