Empowering women is about so much more than ‘representation’

I was apprehensive about my role. How could I discuss emotionally charged issues and present opposing viewpoints for civil consideration without alienating those who disagree? I consider my goal — civil discussion in an era in which people are defined by their politics — a modest one, and I think that every student benefited, even though most were never convinced by my questions or perspectives.

The students were young men and women from all walks of life: some from big cities, others from small towns, with graduating classes ranging from thousands to dozens of peers. Despite these demographic differences, I was startled by how homogeneous their political opinions were and how quickly students took offense.

One early discussion resulted in a student calling another “ignorant” because he wasn’t entirely convinced about climate change. The condemnation was universal, and he quickly backtracked. I am ashamed to admit that I didn’t do anything. I was too worried about losing the class’s respect before I had earned it.

As the course continued, I began to interrupt more frequently, letting the class reach a verbal consensus on an issue, then questioning why students believed it to be true. When the class had agreed that firearms should not be allowed on campus and that the social issues should be addressed first, I asked: Should I be allowed to carry my pepper spray on my key chain every day? I held up my keys, the pepper spray dangling poignantly.

Students then distinguished between lethal or nonlethal weapons. I countered: What about knives? Brass knuckles? What if an attacker decides to do something nonlethal to me, such as theft or rape? Do I have the right to respond lethally if the attacker is perpetrating a nonlethal crime?

The discussion immediately livened up, and in those questions, I began to convey the seriousness of self-defense to women of all ideologies. Two young women, both typically quiet, began to speak, sharing situations both hypothetical and real in which having a weapon could have prevented pain and suffering. The recognition that discussions of self-defense aren’t merely academic but are daily considerations for all women dawned on everyone.

After this incident, the young women began to speak more frequently. Often, it was no more than a simple disagreement from them that sparked lively debate. Feeling represented encouraged them to introduce new ideas — and never again did discussion die for lack of opposing viewpoints. Each student learned to think about different perspectives than their own, articulate their views coherently, and question each other respectfully. Gradually, my apprehension was replaced by sincere enjoyment at the boisterous discussions that emerged.

Granted, judging by the course evaluations, I was despised by several students in the class. Yet I believe that my presence as a conservative woman benefited them as well — they had to think more deeply about, and strongly defend, their preexisting beliefs in order to answer my questions and those of their classmates.

My presence gave the right-of-center women reassurance that they were not the only ones in the room who did not agree with the class consensus and gave them the courage to speak up themselves. And I strongly believe that everyone benefited from seeing examples of civil discussion and learned how to ask questions with genuine curiosity, instead of treating questions as traps for their opponent to fall into.

I believe representation for young women is about so much more than having a female vice president or women on the Supreme Court, though this has been valuable in proving that women are more than capable of assuming these roles.

But women have already internalized the lesson that they must shout to make their voice heard above everyone else. Perhaps the desire to shout has led to shouting over other voices, de-legitimizing others’ views, and contributed to polarization in today’s politics.

The next lesson for women (and every person) should be how to listen respectfully, articulate differences in opinion, and coexist with each other despite differences. After all, despite their representational value, very few women will actually have the opportunity to meet Vice President Kamala Harris or Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett. But all young women have mothers, teachers, peers, and co-workers who represent different views than their own — and who would be more than delighted to share their perspective.

Sarah Montalbano is a student at Montana State University.