If Saturday’s Preakness Stakes was just another good horse race, maybe 10,000 would file into Pimlico. Maybe.
But the Preakness is the real summer kickoff for Marylanders. Forget the beach or your grill — it’s time to head for the infield to get sunburned, drunk, bankrupt and … let’s say overstimulated by college coeds wearing beach gear.
In other words — let’s go have some fun.
This is a better party than the Kentucky Derby. After all, Marylanders were running horses through the streets of Annapolis before George Washington when Kentucky was just an open prairie. The sport of kings came to America through Maryland so locals know how to throw a racing party.
The Preakness is free spirited. It’s casual and not that expensive. There’s no set time to do anything aside p.m. when the Preakness starting gates are supposed to open. And unlike little else you pay to attend, you can make money. Think of it as a four-legged slot machine.
As a veteran of 23 straight Preaknesses, there’s a learning curve to handling 120,000 people jammed into Old Hilltop. Otherwise, you’ll just end up blistered and broke without having any fun.
Rule No. 1: Park at nearby Pimlico Middle School about a half mile from the track. The track’s parking is presold so unless you’re holding a placard right now, you’re in the neighborhoods somewhere. The school is easy to get in and out of and there’s lotsof local kids who will cart your gear to the track for a tip. Just remember, tip well or you won’t cash a ticket. The best time to arrive is after 10 a.m.
Rule No. 2: You can bring your own beer, but it must be in cans. Imagine, a sporting event where you can bring food and drinks. There is some humanity left in the world. Of course, Pimlico sells beer, too.
Rule No. 3: Wear whatever you want. This isn’t the Derby. Sure, some of the clubhouse ladies dress nicely, but you’re heading for the infield. T-shirts and shorts are perfectly acceptable.
Rule No. 4: If you’re going to go shirtless, and many men do after the second beer at 10 a.m., please bring sunscreen. I love looking down on a sea of red around 6 p.m.
Rule No. 5: Bet on your favorite color or number. Your uncle Giacomo. Whatever the guy in front of you in line says. I wish covering racing for 24 years provided a winning system, but beginner’s luck beats everything. And if your kid likes the horse, bet their college fund. Then it’s their fault for having to attend a public college.
Rule No. 6: Don’t think you can buy a cheaper infield ticket and wander over to the grandstand to find an empty seat. Pimlico figured that one out a few years ago and has guards to keep you in the infield. You’ll have a lot better time as a novice in the infield anyway.
Rule No. 7: Get in line long before you must. We’re talking betting windows and restrooms. The lines are long. Remember, you can bet races in advance. My Preakness numbers? Probably 6-5-9. I’ll tell their names on Saturday.
Rule No. 8: Stand in front of the music stage early and surf the crowd. It rocks early in the afternoon. Then head over to the mid-field restrooms where Mardi Gras beads for quick flashes by women are commonplace. Also, wander by WTEM’s all-day show live in the infield with Bram Weinstein. Bram knows horses. Mike Geraghty’s art show in the grandstand is like walking past a museum.
Rule No. 9: Don’t sing “Oh Tannenbaum” when they play “Maryland, My Maryland” during the Preakness post parade.
Rule No. 10: Forget about leaving right after the Preakness. The traffic is awful and a little dangerous. Too many fender benders. There’s one more race afterwards so try to get your money back while the amateurs fight their way out of there. Just remember to return next year.
131st Preakness
When: Saturday
Where: Pimlico
Race Course
Race length: 1 3/16 miles
2005 winner: Afleet Alex (1:55.04).
Rick Snider has covered local sports for 28 years. Contact him at [email protected].
