An Impressive Index
| Courtesy of Random House |
Only Jack Valenti could possibly pull off something like this.
The legendary Hollywood lobbyist, who died in April at the age of 85, knew just about anyone who was anyone and his memoir, “This Time, This Place” (out this week) makes that fact abundantly clear.
Take a look at the book’s index: There are 724 names (although, interestingly enough, neither President Bush 41 or 43 are included. Hmm. …)
The autobiography chronicles Valenti’s life from his Texas childhood to his service in World War II to his time in the White House and as the head of the Motion Picture Association of America.
But Valenti makes it abundantly clear that there was one event that stood out the most: The assassination of John F. Kennedy. (Valenti was six cars behind Kennedy’s limousine when the shooting took place.)
“As I look back on my life, I am still tormented by that day in Dallas that stood witness to the murder of a young president,” Valenti writes. “It haunts me to this hour.”
Other memorable tidbits from Valenti’s book
On LBJ: “He knew every secret of the Senate and its members. He knew who was a drunk, who was screwing whom, and, most of the times, where it was happening.”
On Don Imus: “Don Imus, Charles McCord and Bernard McGuirk always treat me with great kindness.”
On Michael Jackson: “… one weird fellow.”
On playing “Truth or Dare” with Madonna at a dinner party: “My question (I said, ‘Truth,’ for I sure as hell wasn’t going to act out anything) was, ‘What was your most bizarre sexual encounter?’ All eyes and ears were on me, a new big-shot leader in Hollywood. What to answer? I took refuge in the oldest of human responses: I lied. Said I in my most plaintive tones, ‘I was 15 years old, and I was with this beautiful older woman, and all I could do was kiss her.’ ”
On Sen. Jesse Helms, R-N.C.: “…a gargoyle to most of Hollywood’s politically active stars. … I liked him very much.”
On Oliver Stone’s “JFK”: “What I was watching was a piece of beguiling crap, replacing reason with a noisy lie from first scene to last.”
On Tom DeLay: A Republican lobbyist called Valenti and said, “I have been asked to tell you that if the MPAA chooses a Democrat for your job, Tom DeLay and the House leadership will not take this kindly.” Said Valenti: “My spine began to stiffen. So the K Street Project was not some phantom. It was real. And it was right here in my face.”
Valenti opens the book with this touching passage: “I will have shuffled off to that ‘great screening room in the sky’ long before my grandchildren will have formed their own families. But I dare to pray that one day they will pass this book onto their children who will read and hopefully say, ‘We wish we could have known our great-grandfather. He sounds like someone we would enjoy hanging out with.’ ”
