Not since Prince re-christened himself as a symbol has a rebranding decision had this sort of significance. The team once known as the Washington Redskins will play the 2020 season under the moniker of the Washington Football Team. They will have no mascot, and players’ helmets will simply be emblazoned with their numbers.
In the name of wokeness, we erased Native American representation and replaced it with … nothing. That’s what wokeness gets you.
The decision has been mocked, but it’s impossible to lampoon because it mirrors the rise of a politically correct culture, utterly devoid of character and charm. If every mascot is offensive, it only makes sense that none will remain acceptable.
So what if 90% of Native Americans polled said that the Redskins mascot did not offend them? So what if a majority of them said they were proud of a racist cop in Minneapolis who killed an unarmed black man two months ago? So, as a result, our woke betters have decided we must rename totally inoffensive brand names such as “Lady Antebellum” and “The Dixie Chicks” in the name of police reform or something.
But if they insisted, the obvious choice to replace the Redskins name was clearly just to call them the Washingtons — you know, as in the Founding Father after whom our capital was named. But George Washington himself is now canceled, too. Hell, the “Totally Peaceful Protesters,” who have spent the last two months burning down buildings and streaking in the streets, have decided that even statues of abolitionists have to be torn down and destroyed.
I’d call this a slippery slope, except that would imply that the wokes haven’t already declared that everyone is on the chopping block. The Atlanta Braves has been hounded by cries of foul for ages, but this is not reserved to obvious transgressors, such as Native American tribes or Confederates. Still, it is notable that victims of colonialism are just as canceled as the perpetrators of it!
The Washington Post has now declared that “the Texas Rangers’ team name must go.” Yes, the team named after those Western heroes of American folklore are being canceled because, apparently, some of them were racist hundreds of years ago. I’d say the team could go back to being the Senators, as it was known before transplanting to Texas, but did you know some senators were also racist hundreds of years ago?
And so the team formerly known as the Redskins simply accepted that there was no option on the planet that wouldn’t incite calls for cancellations from the mob and settled on choosing no option. It’s a costly concession, as sweatshirts and hats that say “Washington Football Team” aren’t likely to fly off shelves. But better fewer merchandise sales than risk the “Totally Peaceful Protesters” pop over to Maryland to nonviolently chuck a few Molotov cocktails at FedEx Field — in the name of George Floyd, of course.
When everything is offensive and the cost of triggering the mob is cancellation and, possibly, mob violence, you play it safe. That doesn’t just apply to political speech. Every kind of expression is now suspect, whether it be puppy cops on a children’s show facing accusations of irresponsibly celebrating law enforcement or a gay writer getting called racist for poking a bit of fun at Meghan Markle.
In our woke utopia, there will be no space for cartoons or comedy or humor, with the exception of the Nanette sort that reminds us how racist and bad we all are. Sure, we all live on campus now, but all the parties are canceled. Instead, we’re beckoned to cut class and protest, lest any original argument, shower thought, or lone name survive.
