Almost as soon as the rumors started to circulate that Illinois Sen. Barack Obama was considering a run for the presidency, certain questions arose. Though the nation has no doubt made great strides to combat bigotry, pundits noted, the sad fact remains that certain prejudices still exist in our society. Nevertheless, these experts wondered, when confronted with such a handsome, charismatic candidate, could the 21st century American electorate finally abandon its stereotypes and elect a president who is — gulp! — a smoker?
The answer, according to Obama, appears to be “no,” which is why he recently announced, along with his candidacy, that he’d be giving up cigarettes. Clearly, when it comes to accepting presidential smoking, we’ve gone a long way backwards, baby.
Yet there was a time when a smoking president was no big deal. Here I’m thinking specifically of FDR. Every bit the confident chief executive, Roosevelt would cheerfully wave to the crowds from the backseat of his open-top limousine with his signature cigarette holder clenched between his teeth, grinning as if to say, “Lung cancer? Who cares — I’ll be dead from polio within a year!”
Today, of course, smokers are often ostracized, driven from offices, restaurants and theaters, forced to huddle outside like carriers of some highly contagious disease.
The only benefit left to smokers is the freedom to skip out on work to feed their habit, a perk not enjoyed by those with other vices. Few question these regular smoke breaks, yet most employers would likely take exception to coming upon a group of employees standing outside in a doorway, all talking loudly on their cellphones with 1-900 sex chat lines.
The primary criticism lodged at high-profile smokers like Obama is that they set a bad example for children. And it’s certainly true that kids are affected by presidential behavior. Studies have shown, for example, that thanks to President Bush’s highly publicized efforts, the nation has seen a dramatic reduction in incidents of juvenile pretzel choking.
Still, for some reason anti-smoking efforts often fail to resonate with today’s young people. I blame public service announcements. You know the kind, the ones that come on during TV commercial breaks, starring mostly-forgotten celebrities who patronizingly decry smoking:
“Hey kids, it’s me, Anson Williams, Potsie Weber from TV’s ‘Happy Days,’ and I’m here to tell you that smoking isn’t cool. If someone tells you that smoking will make you look more grown up, you tell them Potsie says they’re wrong.”
Meanwhile, the teenagers watching at home are so doubled over with laughter, they can barely hold still enough to light their next cigarette.
The obvious problem with this approach is that kids don’t care what some washed-up actor says is “cool,” except possibly to serve as an example of what not to do. Which is how I hit upon the idea for a more effective type of PSA, one in which the incredibly unhip has-been actor, instead of condemning smoking, actively encourages it.
“Hey kids, it’s me, Potsie, and I’m here to tell you there’s nothing cooler than smoking. [takes a long drag on a cigarette] My pals and I just love putting on our ‘Star Trek’ uniforms to play Dungeons and Dragons in my mom’s basement while listening to our Dr. Demento records and smoking cigarettes. So if someone tells you that smoking will make you look more grown up, they’re absolutely right — and you can tell them Potsie said so.”
With this PSA running regularly, teen smoking rates would drop immediately as kids began to deride their cigarette-smoking peers as “Wannabe Potsies.”
Plus, as a side benefit, these ads would virtually destroy what little chance Anson Williams has of being elected president.
Examiner columnist Malcolm Fleschner has even more ideas for PSAs to help curb everything from truancy to teenage sexual activity.
