On Sunday night, “Cage Fight at the White House” left the world of journalistic metaphor, with a real-life, few-holds-barred mixed martial arts competition on the South Lawn: UFC Freedom 250.

The district’s arbiters of respectable opinion unanimously condemned the spectacle, decrying President Donald Trump for “defiling D.C.” and tarnishing the dignity of the presidential office. “It’s vulgar, it’s violent, it’s commercial,” moaned the Bulwark’s Bill Kristol, who suffered a wave of “melancholy” contemplating the 92-foot “Claw” looming over the executive mansion.