On a cold December day, the judge’s words washed over me: “… taking her from behind and throwing — putting her onto a bed when she’s screaming no … I make a finding of domestic violence was committed … against Ms. Landry.”

I was a face of military advocacy — an installation-level Military Spouse of the Year, published in national outlets, and praised by Air Force and Space Force leadership for my work on military issues. I believed in this institution and fought publicly to make it better. Then I became one of its victims, and found myself navigating the same broken system I had spent years urging others to trust.