When it comes to the culture wars, no one is better at “owning the cons” than conservatives themselves. A new ad from Gillette sparked controversy and drew the ire of conservative commentators and online audiences while drawing applause from more liberal observers. At issue is the question of “toxic masculinity” and whether or not Gillette is taking sides against men in this #MeToo moment in our culture. It’s a disappointing controversy because there should be none. Conservatives have twisted the ad’s message to match their intense and longstanding feeling of victimization by the Left, and it does their arguments about masculinity a great disservice.
Gillette’s ad is not complicated. It begins with several men looking in the mirror, hearing news coverage of #MeToo stories replaying in their head. Buzzwords abound. “Bullying,” “harassment,” “the MeToo movement,” and most importantly, “toxic masculinity,” setting the tone of the ad and defining what men have been called to reflect on in the last year. It goes on to depict men and boys engaging in objectively bad behaviors, robotically accepting those things as normal, and then correcting course by the ad’s conclusion. Gillette says “we believe in the best in men” and notably does not attempt to define masculinity. It seeks distance between men and the worst of what we’ve seen on the news since Harvey Weinstein came crashing down.
The early use of the term toxic masculinity became the centerpiece of coverage and commentary on the ad, with supporters praising Gillette for taking on the issue and critics like Greg Gutfeld of Fox News accepting the false premise that the ad was about that very thing.
But the ad’s not really about toxic masculinity. It’s just a phrase heard by the men in the ad, and like the rest of us, they aren’t quite sure what it even means. Feminists and progressives have chalked off both natural and alarming acts by men as toxic masculinity, and it has created a wound that voices like Jordan Peterson have most notably stepped up to address. When Elliot Rodger murdered six people and injured fourteen others in a shooting spree in Santa Barbara, the popular line was that this “incel” and social pariah embodied a form of masculinity that lashes out when denied or overlooked. In his popular book 12 Rules For Life, Peterson challenged the idea that these victimizers are masculine at all, but in fact dogged by feminine traits and consumed by anger and confusion over this fact. Herein lies the problem.
With the Left overeager to brand any behavior by men as toxic masculinity, the right has forgotten to demand the term be defined and debate what is and is not masculine. Conservative men are not in favor of groping, bullying, physical harassment, or standoffishness. We hear often about how feminism killed off chivalry, damaged fatherhood, and has worked to diminish differences between the sexes. Yet in the ad by Gillette, what you see is men calling on other men to be respectful to women on the street, to not speak for them when their own voice is sufficient, and you see men stepping up to the plate of fatherhood.
Gray area exists in the ad, particularly with the sight of two young boys grappling in the lawn at a neighborhood cookout. Viewers may see different things. Some will see boys having fun and others will note that one boy shrieks and is pinning the other down. Boys are naturally more physical and can be aggressive, and you shouldn’t take parenting advice from Gillette, but young boys have to be taught boundaries in rough play lest they overdo it at school or a friend’s home where consequences can vary. Conservatives know this, and yet Twitter and talk radio would have you believe that it’s not only natural but okay for children to physically dominate one another. This kind of Twilight Zone positioning happened after “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” when right-wing sites stirred up anger about a critique of animal racing in the film. The context was within a larger broadside against casino capitalism and you can’t help but wonder if the big picture of the scene moved conservative viewers to defend positions they don’t actually hold regarding animal abuse.
It’s puzzling to see conservatives like Candace Owens and Ben Shapiro react so viscerally to Gillette’s ad when an underpinning of their politics is that our society is spiritually and morally defunct. Gillette asks men to look in the mirror and think about what kind of men they want to be, to honor women, to lead instead of follow, to respect boundaries and aim higher. Is it “cultural marxism” to say boys need more role models to become good men? While radicals on the Left are actively trying to eliminate natural differences between men and women, it’s remarkable how Gillette goes nowhere near that lightning rod and speaks only to core values.
There is no doubt we live in a moment of uncertainty about what it means to be a man, but conservatives have allowed the Left to set the terms of debate on masculinity — and as a result, conservatives are turning against a brand that bravely acknowledged the distinctness of men, and asked only that when they look in the mirror, they remember the next generation is watching.
Stephen Kent (@Stephen_Kent89) is the spokesperson for Young Voices and host of Beltway Banthas, a Star Wars & politics podcast in D.C.
